As an ex-sysop, I wonder occasionally how a modern chatter would do on an old style BBS.

WWIV-Menu>
==SYSOP Chat Mode Activated==
Sysop: Hey, i need to take the bbs off for a minute to get fido.
User: asl?
Sysop: It'll just be down for a few minutes, call back later, ok?
User: wtf hax?
Sysop: Sorry, I don't understand what you're saying. I've got to reboot too, so I'm going to disconnect you.
User: omfg hax, wtf is tis, spiware? a55h013!
Sysop: Do you require medical assistance? I've got your address on record from the age-check, would you like me to call a medic?
User: roflroflflfoolol who r u
Sysop: If you're having a seizure, don't worry, the ambulance will be there soon. I'm on my parent's phone line right now.
User: wqho are u????
Sysop: I'm the sysop of this BBS. Can you breath?
User: +OPS!!!!!!
Sysop: The 911 operator wants me to stay in chat with you until the medics get there.
User: stfu, how do I gt ops??? /+ops
Sysop: Er, you don't.
User: dudez you got ops, why not for me?
Sysop: Actually, I own the computer you're on.
User: fu lier, gimme ops or I'll hack u
Sysop: ....
User: wtf is ur ip address, l33t hax coming
Sysop: What is an ip address?
User: brb, police
)@(*#)@#
NO CARRIER
Sysop: What just happened?

=SCHEDULED TASK: Fido connection starting...==